Speak to me in Spanish, and only in Spanish
*continuation of previous post*
I looked over to find Hannah, who held an angry expression
while eating her food, clearly aware of the situation. Sarah calmed down and
began to tell me that Hannah told her they can’t be friends anymore, they can’t
hangout anymore, or sit next to each other any more, or even talk anymore. Why
I asked? She continued to tell me that Hannah’s Mom no longer allowed her to be
around, sit by, hangout with, play with, or talk to kids who don’t speak
Spanish, in fact her Mom made it clear she wanted her to only speak Spanish and
nothing else.
I then spoke with Hannah and of course told the situation to
another volunteer with more authority. When asking Hannah what happened, she
told me “My mom only wants me to speak Spanish and play with Mexicans, I can’t
be friends with Sarah anymore because she doesn’t speak Spanish and she isn’t
Mexican”. (Clearly she didn’t mean Mexicans in specific, but anyone with a Hispanic
decent) I have never been put in a situation like this one before. I had no
idea what to say or how to explain how that isn’t ‘okay’ to a second grader,
who won’t believe anything but what their parents say as correct. I then tried
to explain to her, “What if my Mom told me I can’t teach you because you speak
Spanish and I don’t? What if she said that I could only teach kids who speak
English and English only?” I tried to help her understand how it isn’t fair,
and that you should be friends and love everyone equally no matter what color
they are, language they speak, etc.
Of course then I handed the situation over to the other
volunteer with more authority than me. I never imagined being in a situation
like this especially with children so young, but I did my best to handle it in
the right way.
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| Pictured above is the main hallway of Danz Elementary school. It is my favorite because of the wide variety of flags it has. This is one of the ways Danz Elementary has promoted and contributed to Diversity Education, it really makes the students curious as to where each flag comes from. When they ask where each flag comes from or what it represents, they become even more curious about that particular place. This has been a fun way for them to learn and explore multiculturalism and diversity with their own questioning and curiosity. |
I used to run an in home daycare with my mom before I moved out here to Milwaukee, but she still has most of the children that were there while I was home. Being from Baltimore, a few of our kids had seen what was happening in the city and were asking about it and why people were doing what they were doing. With this conversation came questions about skin color and why certain people were doing what they were doing. While trying to explain things in a very vague and simple manner (to a group of 3 and 4 year olds), my mom simply had everyone put their arms next to each other and talked about their skin color, and even mentioned eye color and hair color. By doing this, my mom was able to help the kids realize that it doesn't matter the color of ones hair, skin, or eyes, and that if you like them and consider them to be your friend, then that is all that matters. :)
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed reading your blog about your experience as a volunteer. That seems like a difficult situation to handle. While it is clear that it was damaging of the mother to tell her daughter she was only allowed to speak to others who spoke Spanish, it can also be awkward to overstep what a parent teaches their child. I'm trying to imagine what I would have done in your situation. I would obviously want to teach the child that everyone is equal and she could be friends and speak to others from a different culture. However, I can imagine that as a young child who seems to speak her mind, she would then go home and tell her mother what I had taught her. This would probably anger the mother and create an uncomfortable relationship between the family and school. It's a shame the mother is teaching her daughter at such a young age to be narrow minded when it comes to different cultures.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your experience!
Oh wow, Ellen! That is quite the situation to be put in. I have had similar things happen to me while nannying. One family I worked for had adopted four children from China. They witnessed domestic violence and drug abuse before being abandoned by their family. Their new parents frequently used religion to help the children work through some of the struggles they were facing about their previous circumstances and with the adoption. The youngest boy, who was about 10 years old, had one conversation with me about how he felt his friends who practiced Hinduism were "wrong" because they believed in more than one God when there is only one God. I was quick to assert that they were not "wrong" and that he needed to respect other people's beliefs. When I went home that night, I began to worry if I had just jeopardized my job. It's really hard to be in positions like that where you want to respect the parents and how they want to raise their child but can't live with yourself knowing you just sat there and didn't speak up. I commend you for how you handled the situation! Your response was very creative, and I'm sure it helped to give the little one a bit more perspective. Well done! :)
ReplyDelete